Monday, July 30, 2012

A big decision

This week I had a decision to make.  I was at home in Iowa.  Where everything was familiar and comfortable.  I had the support of my husband and my mother and I did not have the stress of my internship that has made me question a lot of things about myself and my capabilities.  I was home because of my eye, and that was scary, needless to say.  It is still scary.  We do not have a definitive answer for what happened to my eyesight.  I just woke up one day and my right eye was blurry and it stayed that way for a week.  Thankfully, now I have my eyesight back and I learned that I am a bit nearsighted, so I got some glasses for that.  We still do not know the cause.  As stated in a previous blog, it could be Multiple Sclerosis, or it could have been a virus.  We'll hope for a virus.  Anyway, back to the decision.  I was home.  I was getting to spend time with my family.  I got to substitute teach at my mother's preschool where I work during the school year.  I love those kids and feel so at home in that school.  My mother told me that she needs a teacher for the first two weeks in August and she really wanted it to be me and since I was already home, why didn't I just stay.  My husband was missing me.  I had left the day after our wedding and we have not had any time together since.  He really wanted me to stay.  I was getting it from both of them.

But then there was the commitment that I had made.  I had responsibilities in D.C.  I had signed on for an internship that lasted through the 10th of August and I needed to stand behind my commitments.  Isn't that the professional thing to do.

Things have not been easy at my internship.  I am not saying that I wish I had not come, because that is not true, but it has been a challenging summer.  I know that the feedback that I was getting was to make me a better professional and to improve my career, therefore, I am not going to shrug it all off as unnecessary and superfluous.  I have taken in a lot of what has been said to me and I have learned a great deal.

In the end, I said goodbye to my husband and my mother and boarded, first a bus and then a train for my 30 hour trip back to D.C.  I was tired and sore when I got here, but I knew I made the right decision.  Two more weeks.

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